Mistakes
by madparty99
Summary: Lizzington Story. Not everyone is perfect, no matter how perfect you think they maybe. Because everyone makes Mistakes.
1. Being Called Upon Dressed to the Nines

**NOTES:**

School is over tomorrow! YAY! More Lizzington stories from me to you guys! Happy Summer!

I don't own the blacklist (If I did Red and Liz would already be together.) or anyone in the blacklist. I would like to own James and hell I would take Diego or Ryan cause tey can't go with Megan but they still aren't hard on the eyes

Chapter 1: Being Called Upon./ Dressed to the Nines for you

She pulled on her long strapless black dress. Twisted her long brown hair into a delicate French twist. Stepped into her red pumps. Smoothed on a light coat of makeup. Checked and doubled checked her appearance in the mirror before walking outside to the awaiting car.

"Mrs. Reddington" Dembe said as he held the dark colored car's door open for her to climb inside.

"It's Liz please don't call me Mrs. Reddington, but thank you." The light pat on his upper arm supplemented the thank you she verbally gave him.

The car ride was long and full of anxiety. The simple request of dressing up and meeting him at an undisclosed location was slowly getting to her. Leaving her kicking herself for not questioning him.

The heels were too tight, hair slowly falling out from not enough hairspray, dress was tight around her chest causing minor difficulties in breathing normally. It had been a while since she had to purchase her own clothing.

Dembe slowed the car at a large house, a mansion, but was so grand it had a royal appearance. The stone outside with a large front window that showcased a huge chandelier. Liz knew this place all too well,

Dembe walked around the car and opened the door for her to step out.  
He led her to the front door before returning to the car and driving away. Leaving her there stranded.

The door was open widely revealing a man she had no clue who he was, only that he was dressed like a butler. Which was the role he must be playing in this elaborate production. Liz could hear a chef and his cooks moving around the kitchen and the smells coming from there were enticing. Even though she hadn't eating and it smelled amazing that was the last thing on her mind.

She walked toward a dining room with yet again a larger than life chandelier, much the the man she was meeting. The butler pulled out her seat for her to sit in and wait for said man. The thought of sitting was nerve-racking but duty fully she sat.

She was jolted out of her musings when a man spoke into her ear. "You my dear look ravishing. I honestly was expecting Dembe to come back empty handed."

His soft lips met her cheek and she automatically leaned into his touch, despite all of the tension still lying between them.

Red walked to the front of her and presented her with a single red rose. "For my belle, may I forever be your beast."

That's what he is doing. Liz realized. She called him a monster, and called for a divorce. He wanted her to come back.

"No, I can't." Liz exclaimed and quickly pushed passed him to run out the door. The anger and tears welling up inside of her. She would walk back if she had to.

"Lizzie." Red called out to her. He ran after her, not allowing her to slip out of his fingers again.

She was on the steps of the house, her house, their house. Tears covering her face, mascara starting to smear.

"Don't." She said lightly when the front door creaked open. "Don't say you did this to get me back. What you did to me was awful and completely unforgivable. Now march back in the house, tell everyone get out, and find me a ride back to the hotel."

"No." He plopped unceremoniously next to her.

"I will walk." She stood up and finished her way down the stairs. So he did the same and followed her.

"You tell me you love me." Liz stopped in her tracks and looked at him. "You tell me I am special. You make me fall in love with you. I do love you, don't ever think otherwise. But you don't cheat on the person you love, and that is forever unforgivable."

He did. He cheated.

It was the third year after Sam died, last month. That weekend Liz when to Oklahoma to spend it with her Aunt June and to visit Sam's grave.

Madeline was in DC, she called and he went to see her. In Madeline's hotel room he make the biggest mistake he had ever made.

Red told Liz when she got home what he did. She didn't cry, didn't react in anyway, just picked herself up and walked out of their house.

Liz was not wrong for leaving.

"Lizzie," he said trying to reach out for her arm.

"Don't touch me! Or call me Lizzie. I am not yours, you don't get to call me that anymore. You lost that right when you dropped your pants for her! It's Liz or Elizabeth, but don't you dare call me Lizzie!" She snapped although her voice calming toward the end, around that word.

"I made a mistake, a lapse in judgement, but Elizabeth please. I am begging, I don't know what to do without you." He was actually crying out for her, he did need her. Liz could see that, but he put her through hell. He needed to understand her feelings.

"You are going to drink, a lot. It helps, drowning your pain in a bottle or two of wine, becoming so drunk that you can't feel that pain anymore. And then when you finally move on, you'll find a new girl or return to Maddy, like you have done time and time before." Her words were ice, clearly having done these things herself in the past month.

"But all I want is you. No wine can make me feel better for what I have done. You are the only person who has always loved me, I can't ever replace you." Red turned to her fully. "But of this is what you want, I will let you go. Just don't walk, let me call Dembe back."

"Thank you."

The walk back to the house was short and quiet, with good reason. He called Dembe, who was now on his way back.

"May I ask a question?" Liz asked her voice small.

"Always."

"Why?"

"Why I did it, or why I want you back?"

"Both, I guess. I mean Madeline is smart, and pretty and more your age- so that would mean less stares in public and she is more like you than I am." Her voice so tiny and shaky, this was definitely not his Lizzie, this is what he had created from his actions. This is the Liz he knew from the actions Tom had done, he was no better of a man than Tom. He always thought he was, he cared and loved Liz with all  
of his heart, but in this moment he realized he was no better.

"I was mad you didn't want me to go with you. I know you needed time away from everything and just focus on him and your Aunt June but I was hurt you didn't want me there, because I love you Elizabeth." Her full name felt strange on his tongue, especially with that statement. "Madeline called asking if we were available for dinner, and one thing led to another. Madeline is smart, and pretty and more my age. But you are a genius, I find joy watching you outshine every guy at the post office who thinks you shouldn't be there. You are drop dead gorgeous, your blue eyes and your smile, and everything else that is inappropriate right now. I like getting looks in public, because that is how I feel- like why is this pretty little thing on my arm when she could have anyone at the drop of a hat."

Liz ran over to him and captured his lips with her own. Loving the emotions behind what he was saying. Neither moved to deepen the kiss in anyway just content to be with each other.

Liz pulled away, hearing Dembe pulling into the driveway. "I still don't completely forgive you. But we can try to work it out. Good night, Raymond." Liz started to walk toward the door.

"Elizabeth? No, I can't keep calling you that. Lizzie?"

"Hmm?" She said almost out the door.

"Sleep tight."

She gave him a smile and walked out the door.


	2. Putting Up A Strong Front Needing You

I like this quote. It doesn't really go with the story but goes well with Red/Liz:

"I, with a deeper instinct, choose a man who compels my strength, who makes enormous demands on me, who does not doubt my courage or my toughness, who does not believe me naïve or innocent, who has the courage to treat me like a woman."  
― Anais Nin

* * *

Putting Up A Strong Front/ Needing You

Dembe drove Liz back to the small hotel; it had a homey feel that drew her to it. She got one of the inexpensive rooms, not wanting to spend more than she had too. Her room had a king sized bed which was way more than she needed, and a little window seat that after work she would sit under and have a glass of wine. It also had a huge tub that after long day, mostly from dealing with Ressler and his line of never ending questions or like today she would fill to the rim with bubbles and soak in.

Liz filled up the tub with lavender scented bubble bath and scolding hot water, hoping she could burn the feel of him off of her. She poured herself a glass of her favorite wine before Red bought her expensive wines and showed to his favorites, a Vega Sindoa 2006 Cabernet Sauvignon. Not only was it decent and cheap but Tom had hated it and it wasn't up to Red's standards? It didn't link her to either awful men.

The water was getting cold and she was out of wine, and it was time to get out but she didn't want to go to bed alone again, like every other day for the past month.

Liz dragged herself out of the tub and wrapped herself in a puffy white towel. The fabric felt nice against her skin and brought forth the memory of her and Red in a cabin in the woods where exactly she wasn't sure. But it was winter and the heat went out and the only way to keep warm was to have sex, and lots of it. They did it everywhere that weekend, the couch, the bed, the dining room table, and on top of the bear skin carpet. The fur was so soft, and the sex was so good that they did it on the floor more than the bed. And okay maybe in hindsight it wasn't the only option but it kept them warm and entertained.

Liz rummaged through the dresser and found a light blue long sleeve button up, it was Red's. She pulled the shirt on and slid a pair of black panties. She started at the bottom buttons and stopped once her breasts were mostly covered.

Liz crawled into bed and covered herself under the heavy comforter, then adjusted the pillows in a body-like shape. She curled her body into the pillows like she would if it was Red.

Liz balled. Her life was once again crumbling around her and she didn't know how much longer she could do this for. She wanted Red back so badly, but she would look like a fool if she went back to him after what he did to her. Liz felt like she did when she found the box underneath the floorboards and the picture of Gina and Tom. Like it was all a lie and that things could get better, but as she learned with Tom things like that only happen in the movies.

After an hour of crying she got up and grabbed her bottle of sleeping pills she got a few days before. Liz originally didn't really want them but her doctor prescribed them to her in case she desired to actually sleep, and not be alcohol induced.

She needed to go to sleep and just pretend she didn't need him.

She dreamt of him all night.

-

Red angrily told everyone to go home. He wasn't mad at Liz, not at all. He was strangely proud of her. She was standing up to him and wasn't going to cave in no matter how much he knew she wanted to. He figured that she wanted when she came and when he whispered into her ear she leaned into him. Where was this Liz when everything happened with Tom.  
Once everyone left he removed his shielding- the suit coat, vest and tie. He unbuttoned three of the top buttons on his white button down shirt, and untucked it from his pants.

Red went down into their wine cellar and searched for her favorite wine. He couldn't remember the name and she always went down and grabbed it. He knew the label and it was white wine not red which always surprised him. When they went out she ordered red, and when she was with Tom she always had red. But when it was just the two of them she always had a glass of white. Just one of her little quirks he loves about her.

Finding the wine took a little while, they had a pretty large collection of different wines. Once he found it he notice there was only two bottles left, he had Dembe order a bunch when she told him it was her favorite. He made a mental note to buy more, and to learn the name of it.

He carried the bottle upstairs and brought it into her favorite room, the library. He grabbed the book they were reading together before she left, every night he would read out loud a chapter before they either ended up sleeping on the couch or running into the bedroom to, well, you know what.

He pulled the cork out and saw a pink smudge on the rim. She must have drunk it right from the bottle; Lizzie must have been fun that night. He took the lead from and took a swig from the bottle.

That little more of her he found on the bottle, was almost enough to make him run into her hotel room to ravish her.

He relished in the wine and the taste because it tasted like she so often did. He wanted her lips on his and her body against his. Wanted the taste of her on his lips and her eyes moving over his body and his over hers. He wanted Lizzie in the worst possible way.

Red spend all night awake thinking of ways to get her back, finished the wine and the book. If she ever did come back he wouldn't tell her about him finishing the book, it would be just another reason for her to get mad.

He decided he would go to the post office either tomorrow or the next day with another name. She would have to talk to him, or at least yell at him. He would at the very least get to see her.

But does he want to do that to her? Does he want to make her work with him when she doesn't even want to look at him? Normally Red would answer no to these questions but he was becoming desperate. He needed her back more than ever.

Just what did he do when he saw her again? The man who knew what to do in every situation had no clue what to do with her.


	3. You are Stupider than I thought

NOTES: 

Well its short but I got inspired and wrote it down. I think I might just do a lot of short chapters. They are easier to edit and I can really focus on what is going on in the scene. I don't know, just an idea.

* * *

"You are Stupider than I thought"

'God work is so boring with no new cases.' Liz thought to herself as she continued on paper work. All she really had to do was sign her name a couple thousand times, it was tedious and annoying. All she wanted to do was run away from criminal while there is shrapnel and gun fire, but that also meant he would have to come back. Liz did not want to deal with him and his shit right now.

She heard his laugh. Then it disappeared as soon as it came. 'I just miss him and it's because I'm bored and tired.' She told herself, trying not to get her hopes up and she was still pissed at him, or at least trying to be.

Liz went back to her paperwork trying to block everything from around her. And an hour later she had completed all the paperwork that she needed to today and was able to leave an hour early. Liz felt rather accomplished and was going to reward herself with a gallon of chocolate ice cream and a chick flick.

"Liz!" Ressler called for her before she stepped onto the elevator.

"What's up?"

Seemingly nervous Ressler looked around for a minute before continuing on. "Why is Meera going on the undercover mission with Reddington tonight?"

"Don, what undercover mission?"

"He didn't tell you?"

"No." Liz was already starting to see where this was going. "What mission!"

"Meera and Red are going out to dinner with an informant of his. She is being his wife, because the guy knows he is married but has never met... Well you." Donald was becoming slightly scarred of Liz in this situation, she looked like she was going to throw things or punch him or something else violent.

"Listen Donald I have to go have a chat with my husband, but thanks."

Liz was furious. Yes, they weren't getting along but isn't this the reason they aren't? She saw him two days ago and he never even mentioned a new name. She was so mad Liz was seeing red. She took her car and drove straight to their house. Liz was gonna yell.

"What the hell is wrong with you?!" Liz screamed as she flung open the front door, causing the door to bounce off the wall and a loud 'thud' to reverberate through the large front entry.

"Liz?" His voice was distant, living room maybe?

"Yes! Me, your wife. Unless you have forgotten recently!"

"I haven't forgotten, what's the matter?" Red put his hands up in defense.

"What's the matter?! The matter is that one affair wasn't enough, and that now you are fucking replacing me with Meera! I thought you said you didn't mean to have sex with Madeline. Oh! I see, you didn't plan to have sex with her because you are seeing Meera. Because you are an asshole."

The lets-make-Liz-so-jealous-that-she-needs-to-talk-to-me plan was not working out the way he had hoped.

"I am not having an affair with Meera. I needed a date to go with me tomorrow and you aren't talking to me."

"I have tried talking to you before and it doesn't work! I just get more half-truths and shoved more in the dark. It has always been this way with you and I was just stupid enough to fall into you fucking trap." She was on the verge of crying, her face was red, breathing heavy and labored. This was truly hurting her to say. "How long were you going to use me for? A few years? Until the list was finished? Then what? Divorce me and kick me to the curb like garbage, find yourself some petite blue eyed skanky blonde who is ten years younger than me."

"Liz! No, sweetheart, it has never been like that for me! I asked Meera to come to try to make you jealous." He said trying to ignore the pain growing in his chest.

"You are stupider than I thought. Anyways go fuck yourself, or Meera, or better yet Madeline. I will get the papers tomorrow, and don't worry I don't want anything from you. I only want you so leave me the hell alone and find yourself a new naive FBI agent to fuck with her emotions." Liz quickly turned on her heel and make her way to the door. Knowing he was following her she stopped short and saw him only a few steps behind her.  
"I hate you." Liz threw her wedding and engagement rings at him and left the house.

For the first time Liz felt slightly better and for the first time Red could feel his heart breaking in two.

* * *

Well Liz is mad...

And Red messed things up more for them.

Will he ever get her back?


	4. Moments of Impact

Moments of Impact

She was mad at him. She was mad at herself. She was mad that she allowed their marriage to fall apart like this. She should have just taken him back right away. Liz knows he loves her.

The roads where dark and twisty leading away from the house. Her brain was fogged over with anger. The impact was one of great force.

The metal was twisted and bent. The blood slowly seeping from her body, slowly losing life with each drop. She tried to call out for someone; her voice was consumed by the wind. No one was going to find her in time. The blood loss was too great and Liz passed out believe she was going to die.

-

Raymond wasn't going to allow her to walk away. He loved her too much for that to happen.

He didn't care if he had to sit outside the hotel door all night to see her. He was going to get Liz back no matter what it takes.

He shoved the rings in his jacket pocket, grabbed the keys and ran out after her.

-

His headlights illuminated the mangled cars metal. He knew that car... Lizzie!

Red stopped his car, and ran over to the car that curled around a tree. "Lizzie!"

He saw her head against the steering wheel on top of a deflated airbag. Blood trails down her cheek, a pool at her feet and she was unconscious.

"Elizabeth don't you dare die! Don't you die!"

The door was hard to open because of the curled metal but between Red's strength and the adrenaline pumping throughout his body he was able to open it.

He put on arm under her knees and one around her shoulders. Liz had lost weight in the past month, making her even easier to carry than before.

Red kept repeating "don't die." Like it was a prayer and it was going to actually keep her alive.

He opened the back door with minor difficulties, and laid her limp body along the seat. Then climbed into the driver's seat and carefully started to drive her to the hospital.

He pulled out his phone and called Dembe.

"It's Lizzie. She got into a car accident." His voice was not of his own; it was broken, fragile and scared sounding.

This worried Dembe, the small fact that Raymond Reddington was scared. He was never scared. "I will call the FBI. Do not panic. Liz will be okay."

They ended the call quickly, and Red knew Dembe was right. He could not panic.

"Deep breaths." He took a few long calming breaths and then sped up faster. He knew that she only had a few minutes left if he didn't get there soon.

Five minutes later Red was carrying her into the ER.

Red watched as a flood of doctors surrounded her in the trauma bay while he explained to another doctor what happened. He heard the dreaded word- "Clear!" He knew she was slipping away, and there was nothing he could do to help her. He walked out to the waiting room and saw a room filled with people for Liz; Dembe, Mr. Kaplan, Meera, Cooper, Ressler, and Aram.

Everyone stood up waiting for him to tell them what happened. He explained everything about how they got into a fight and she left and got in an accident. They all saw how worked up he was over her, it was strange for Red to show this much emotion in front of these people.

The way Liz looked when he found her, he honestly didn't believe she would make it.

Liz's doctor walked out of the ER.  
Once again everyone stood up.

"Well Elizabeth is a fighter, she is stable for now. However she is going up to the OR for brain surgery. Liz's brain was damaged badly in the accident and it is unlikely that she return back to full function and this surgery is risky but if she doesn't have it she will die. We have also given her a blood transfusion, she has a pretty deep cut along her abdomen, but that is all stitched. Any questions? I know this is a lot."

They all shook their heads, the tears starting to fall.

Everyone was in tears, even down to Mr. Kaplan. Liz had touched everyone in some way. She loved making people smile, even if she was slowly withering on the inside.

Raymond was a wreck.

His Lizzie was going to die and it was because of him and his stupid actions.

-

Hours had passed since that update. And everyone was becoming more and more anxious for news on her condition.

When Red had arrived at the hospital it was 7:30, when they had brought her into surgery it was 8:00-ish and now it was 1:27.

"Mr. Reddington?" The doctor came out, finally.

"Yes! Is she okay?"

"Elizabeth coded three times during the beginning of the surgery, but she is stable and her stats are becoming increasingly better as time goes on. We gave her the medicine to wake her, so we can check brain function and she should be waking up soon. However if she doesn't wake up we will give her twenty four hours and at that point if she doesn't wake up we will have to pronounce her brain dead."

"When can I see her?"

"Now."

The doctor led him up to the ICU.

Her eyes were open.

"Lizzie!"

"Hmm... Ray?" She mumbled out. "I can't move."

The doctor stopped his exam to say, "We don't know the full extent of the rest of your injuries yet. We were waiting until you were stable to bring you the CT scan and the x-ray."

Red stayed in the room with her for a few minutes before they had to bring her down to radiology.

She is alive. She is alive.

An hour later the wheeled Liz back into the room. She was already back asleep, which is good gives her brain more time to heal.

"She is very lucky, no other internal damage. However her right ankle and foot is broken, that is simple casting. We will have the ortho surgeon come cast her." He left without another word.

Red updated everyone and they all stayed. It's not like the post office really had work to do without Red and Liz.

When he returned she was gone. Her brain had swelled and she need to have her skull flap removed to get rid of the pressure.

-

Three days had passed since that night.

Liz still hadn't woken up again. The doctors kept saying she was passing most of the neurological exam but was in a coma. Her leg has a large plaster cast on it. She looked as though she was hit by a bus.

Red never left her side. He never moved, he wasn't going to leave her.

"Lizzie, sweetheart, please wake up."

-

Haha... So I am sure this is not what most of you expected to happen next... Sorry if you hate it and I ruined the story for you.

Liz crashed her car. And before I get reviews saying that Liz would never do that to herself. It was an accident. She didn't purposely crash her car. Okay? Liz wouldn't do that.

Will she wake up out of her coma? If she does will she take him back with open arms or will she shut him out again? (I honestly don't know the answer yet...)

Thanks for reading!


	5. Life or Death A

A Note: After some thought I decided that I have two ways I want this story to end. So I am writing two different outcomes!

Life or Death Part 1 (Chapter 5a)

The long exaggerated beep, the swarm of doctors and nurses that engulfed her small fragile body. The sounds of doctors yelling and calling out clear. Was a blur.

Raymond left the room after the first shock. He was in the way and it was killing him to see her like that.

Liz was always so strong, physically and mentally, especially after everything she has gone through. The fire, moving in with Sam, going to the academy, marrying and then fighting Tom, the blacklist. After all she has fought through, the bombs the poisonings, the multitude of gun fire. The thing that was going to kill her, or the thing that started it all, was him cheating on her.

-

Over the few days while Liz was in a coma, he couldn't help but think what if he didn't cheat on her.

She wouldn't be in a vegetable state, first of all.

He would have her in arms; he would be able to hold her and touch her and make love with her.

He would have been able to give her baby she had begged for. But he told her no.

He wouldn't have to bury his best friend. His second chance. His Lizzie.

They tried to revive her.

Liz's heart was too weak to bring back. It had been broken and iced over, then melted and repaired, then broken and iced again. The difference between the first time it was broken and now is that deep down Liz never fully loved Tom; Liz loved Red with all of her heart until he tore it in half.

They tried.

There had been a night where they both talked about everything they wanted in life.

Everything.

Liz wanted a baby, most of all. Just one and she didn't have a preference, boy or girl. The name would be Samuel or Samantha.

She wanted the bedroom walls to be light blue, like the sky. And white colored sheets and blankets, so the bed was a cloud.

Liz wanted to see new places. It didn't matter if she left the country or not. She only wanted to see things she had never seen before.

Liz went as far as describing how she wanted her funeral. She wanted people to wear light airy colors. And the poem, Death is nothing at all, to be read.

He thought her choice of poem was odd, looking at it now. It was like she knew she would go before he would. It's what he told Liz to do with Sam.

She wanted a white coffin with a red inside. She wanted to wear her favorite red dress with her matching red heels. He had asked her why so much red. Her response, "When I get to hell, the devil is going to know I'm yours." Liz wanted her locket necklace with her and Sam as the picture, and her engagement and her wedding rings. Liz wanted to be buried next to him.

-

He gave Liz the funeral she wanted.

He gave her the look she wanted, the hair, the dress, and the shoes.

He read the poem and told stories about her.

He watched as they lowered her into the ground. Finally allowing the flood of tears to come out after he threw down a single red rose.

She was his belle, and he, her beast.

-

Red wanted to drink himself into a drunken stupor. He wanted to feel the bitter liquid burn down the back of his throat.

But he didn't.

Red knew that Liz wouldn't want him to mourn her in that way. She wasn't that type of person.

Liz would want him telling people the good memories he has of her. She would want him to catch more criminals.

She would want him to be happy.

Even though she knows he would never be completely happy again.

-

"Liz was so excited. It was her first time in Havana. It would be like giving a child a lollipop, that is how excited she was. Her hair was flowing in the breeze, her eyes were the same color of the water, and her skin was glowing against the sand." Red closed his eyes remembering how beautiful she looked that day. It was one of his most favorite memories of her. "That was the first time she kissed me." He stopped again thinking about the taste she had, it was salty from the ocean air but was also sweet. "God, I miss her."

"It will get easier in time." Madeline said as she grabbed his hand.

Another Note! Please don't hurt me! The next chapter should be posted tomorrow, and Liz will live!


	6. Life or Death B

Hi! Well this is the second option as a conclusion to Mistakes! Thank You so much for reading.

Its a little happier than the last chapter...

* * *

Life or Death B

Liz had been awake for a few minutes before she found the strength to make a sound. "Ow." It was more of a moan or a sigh than the word itself, but it was enough to get Red jump out of his chair and run to her side.

"Lizzie!" He yelled without thought.

Her face twisted and distorted in pain. Eye brows furrowed together, eyes closed, and a slight moan came out.

"Sorry sweetheart. I am just so happy you woke up, you have no clue how much you scared me."  
His voice now no more than a whisper. "Don't you dare almost die again." He as he kissed her forehead.

One more surgery, three weeks of therapy and Liz was finally ready to go home.

She was in a walking boot now for her broken ankle, and only need some assistance walking.

The first night home Liz didn't feel like doing too much. It was a huge deal that she got to leave the hospital, and she by no means wanted to return. They lazed around all day, neither really wanting to address the elephant in the room. Red and Liz spent the afternoon in the library, drinking tea and reading, no one speaking to each other except for his constant checking on her.

Liz was having difficulties following the words; her brain kept forgetting where she was or what she had just read. She spent the afternoon trying to make sure Red didn't see her struggle.

Liz's right hand had grown weak, her entire right side actually. She had trouble holding onto the fork, and once again didn't want to break her pride and ask for help, that made dinner almost impossible for her to get through. Somehow she did without any questions.

"Ray?" She called out to him after he got her comfortable in bed. He was surely going to change himself and go to bed soon.

Red was going to sleep in one of the guess rooms they had reserved for a baby, if he would ever let her have one.

"Yes, dear?" He turned.

"Don't leave me." She cried, not being able to contain the emotions she spent so hard keeping in.

"I'm just going across the hall; I will leave the door open." He saw her facial expression, and the tears staining her bright pink cheeks. But he didn't want to push her boundaries she created in the hospital.

"I forgive you." She choked out.

"Lizzie?" He said in disbelief.

"Stay. Please. I would come to you but I am so tired."

That's all he needed to hear. In an instant he was beside her on the bed and their lips were meeting in a frenzied passion.

Three months had passed since they had made up. She seemed to be back to her old self again. The violent mood swings have seemed to end, her insomnia slowly gave away, and she was able to read with no trouble. The one thing that hadn't gotten better was the weakness. Now there was also numbness and tingling on her right side.

Red barely noticed. Liz hid most of the signs of it, all except for her handwriting which was almost illegible. She had told him not to worry about it, and so he believed her and didn't.

Work didn't make her do a full evaluation; she had become one of their best agents. So they too trusted her when she told them she was fine and ready to work.

Liz was again on fire. Her marriage was great, and work was great. She just didn't allow herself to get into situation where she would need to use her gun.

Then. Just as things were finally better.

Liz found herself back in the hospital. Her arm and leg went numb and she fell.

"Ray! I didn't mean to lie to you! I just didn't think it was a big deal!"

"Lizzie! There is a blood clot in your brain that would have only needed medicine to fix but I didn't find out fast enough to bring you to the hospital. So now I have to risk losing you again. Do you know how much the first four surgeries hurt me? Now I have to send you in for a fifth?"

"I know I'm sorry! I just wanted us to go back to normal and I was afraid that if I told you about it that you wouldn't want to deal with me and my medical problems." She paused. "I was afraid you would leave me."

"I am hurt that you would think that!" He was mad, and hurt. He thought they were really in the clear but in reality she was just lying to him. "You know what Liz? I am going to leave you. I have never lied to you and I am really hurt that you lied to me."

Red turned and walked out of the hospital room. Leaving Liz crying and confused.

She went in for surgery and he still hadn't returned.

Red hadn't left the hospital. He wandered through the halls thinking. He got so caught up that he didn't make it back before Liz went into surgery. He sat in the chair, his face in his hands. How could he be so stupid?

She woke up from surgery she saw Red sitting in the large purple armchair pulled up to the side of the bed. His hand in hers.

"Lizzie, I'm sorry. I am the biggest asshole and I..."

"Shh. Please, I am so done with fighting with you. Let's just try to get along and be happy."

"Okay."

"I love you, and I always will." She squeezed his hand, and it wasn't numb, the surgery worked.

"I love you; I always have." He looked into her eyes and for the first time in a long time saw the sparkle that had been missing for so long.

"We can make this work as long as I can forgive your mistakes and you can forgive mine."

The kiss to her hand was all the reply she needed to know they would always be together, no matter what.

* * *

Another Note:

Originally it was only going to be that Liz dies, like in the last chapter, but after some prompting I decided to do two different endings... Let me know which one you prefer in the review section or PM me.

Well that is it for this story! Thank you for reading, I hope you enjoyed. Until next time…


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